Yvette's Inner Geek Blog

The new Toyfare magazine (#113) came in the mail today. I started to browse through it after dinner while I was eating a cookie and drinking some soy milk. Ben looked over my shoulder when I called "Transformers!" and scoffed at Hasbro's "A Blast from the Past" ad for a redesigned Megatron. "That's not Megatron," he said, and walked away.

I ho-hummed a lot of the Incoming! annoucements, but perked up at the news of a new series coming out next summer from DC Direct: Fables! I love that series, so of course I put down my cookie and starting gushing about the new toys to Ben, who was by now sitting at his computer absorbing remnants of the 2006 baseball season. He (predictably) rolled his eyes, called me a geek and said that we didn't need more toys, but that didn't stop me from squealing and gushing, nor from giggling about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on the next page.

Then I called "Transformers!" again and quoted from page 53, "New Transformers Classics run rampant over Kentucky at BotCon 2006!"

"New Transformers Classics?," he hissed. "They all suck."

I brought him the magazine and he did his whole spiel of "they'll never be as good as they used to be, these aren't real Transformers, etc." peppered with a little "Why didn't I know there was a BotCon in Lexington when we lived in Cincinnati?" I said that I would be happy to take the magazine back, and he said "In a minute." He turned the page and giggled a little "cool!" to himself and kept reading.

Then he turned to page 58 and I watched my husband (a self-proclaimed Not-a-Toy-Collector, except for model railroads which don't count) turn into a nine-year-old boy. 

"SOUNDWAVE! The ORIGINAL! They're re-releasing it just like they re-released some of them a few years ago!"

(I bought him the G1 reissues of Jazz and Optimus Prime to his pure, unabated delight) 

He proceeded to read me the blurb about the reissue as well as the captions... "And then Soundwave says 'My crotch says 'STOP' but my heart says GO' and Ravage, the cassette, says '...what does an MP3 look like?' Tee hee! This is a GOTTA have. I have to have this! I can't live without it! SOUNDWAVE!" 

I smiled as he geeked out and reverted to little boy excitement. "When does it come out?" I asked, taking the last bite of my cookie and a swig of milk.

"Let's see... Spring 2007." Wait for it. "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

I knew it wouldn't be out yet, and I knew he wouldn't like having to wait. Yet I sat there with my mouth on my glass and inhaled with laughter at his reaction... then spit, as in near-vomit spit, all over the table and across it, all over Ben's jacket that was hanging on the opposite chair.

I started choking and crying and when Ben came over and asked if I was okay, I nearly peed myself. I haven't laughed that hard... ever, actually! It was a mix of pain and trying to gasp for breath with some milk still in my mouth and that cookie, that precious cookie that I did not want to lose.

I ran to the bathroom to let loose the flood of urine that threatened my dignity, laughing and crying all the way. It took me about 10 minutes to recover, and my chest still hurts. None of it came out of my nose, but wow.

Thank you, Transformers, for making my night.