This adventure, with an all-star political cast, has been making its way around the internet since mid-October for good reason. It’s GREAT. It is a MUST READ if you are a geek who knows anything about current election politics.
It was written by clever geek girl somehedgehog. She deserves all the internet love, money, and fame that you can provide. Thanks to foundinidaho (who was “spudlostinutah” until she moved back home to Boise) for sending it to me in the first place!
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Adventuring Party Politics: The Campaign is Getting Ugly
by somehedgehog
GM: OK, the bugbear attacks you. What do you do?
OBAMA: I send one of my 672 henchmen after it.
MCCAIN: OK, seriously. Why does he have so many henchmen? I’m a level 72 ranger and he’s only a level 8 paladin.
OBAMA: Well, if you’d bought the Grassroots Organizing and Oratory/Colgate Smile proficiencies you could min max it so that you…
MCCAIN: Why is he even IN this campaign? I thought this was supposed to be a high level party.
OBAMA: Well, maybe some people got tired of the grim and squinty “Matterhorn, son of Marathon” shtick you keep doing. Dude, could you be any less original?
MCCAIN: Oh my god, I did not leave my left nut in a tiger cage in the Tomb of Horrors to spend my Friday nights mopping up after the new kid. Read more…
But I don’t have the books or a local group of interested friends, so for now I guess I’ll go spit-shine my 20-sideds and think about putting a sign in the local comic book shop:
“Geeks wanted to play 4th Edition D&D. Ideal candidates score between 20% and 65% on the Geek Test and do not live in mom’s basement. Must own multi-sided dice, be over age 21, and contribute regularly to game night beer and snacks.”
I have one foot planted firmly on each side of the career doorway and am stuck doing repeated side lunges to the point where everything hurts all over… but when I try to stop, I end up teetering over the center until the side lunges start all over again.
I haven’t managed to do everything that I want to do lately even though I’m no longer working a full-time job. Crazy the way that works… but let’s go ahead and blame some of that on the fact that I am actually job hunting and so a fair portion of my days have been spent updating resumes and trolling Monster.com and local job postings and getting distracted by the online freelance writing advice or the pull of my growing You Can Do It And This Is How freelance writing books and becoming cross-motivated to still give the freelance thing a 100% try.
Blogging about this writing/career trauma I’m currently experiencing creates another conundrum: I need to start a second blog about Becoming a Writer so that I don’t turn this one into a play-by-play that will alienate readers who just want the really geeky stuff and don’t necessarily care about my writerly journey. (Which is okay, so don’t feel guilty if that’s you.) More on that when it happens.
Modofly. Speaking of RPGs, how about a beautiful Moleskine notebook with a laser-etched Cthulu-esque design on the front? Or a highly detailed locomotive? Or two old school joysticks? Or an emu? This artist collaborative offers several incredibly cool laser-etched artists’ designs on the front of Moleskines, which are the most beautiful, expensive notebooks out there. If I treat myself to one, I make sure to use a very nice, archival-safe pen to write in it. They’re also great for drawing in, but I’m not much of an artist so the most I usually have are little doodles for emphasis or detail. (Thanks for the link to the Wired article about this company, Erica!)
That’s all the geeky links I have for you right now. This evening I’m picking up my friend Liz from the airport (YAY!) and I’m looking forward to hanging out with her for a couple days. My, how plans change… I was going to take Monday off work, but obviously that’s not an issue right now. Ben was supposed to be here this weekend, but unfortunately he’s on his way back to Ohio right now for a funeral. I’ll try to spend a little more time formatting my blog and website this weekend if Liz and I aren’t too busy being as Wild and Crazy as you can be in conservative Utah (which basically means adding some Peach Schnapps to orange juice and watching R-rated movies).
I’ll feel guilty trying to have fun while Ben is grieving with his family, but I sent along some heartfelt sympathy cards and I don’t think there’s much else that I can do at this point. I also can’t help but look forward to Ben’s return because he took a decent-size suitcase that could potentially transport a new-in-the-box Atari 2600 that is reportedly lurking somewhere in a closet at his parents’ house.
What do I have to say for myself on this Monday morning? I had a good weekend, though not a hell of a lot really got done. I ended up having to work a half day on Sunday (blargh, I thought weekend work was over after quitting my hotel job). I didn’t finish any of the posts I wrote; even the one I’m most excited about which is an overview of all the 2008 summer movies for geeks. Iron Man is the first one on the list, and it opened already… man, I wish I had finished that Friday night. But now it’s Coming Soon to a blog near you.
But Free Comic Book Day on Saturday! W007! Last year, I got there too late and a lot of the free stuff was gone. But this year I got a nice stack that hopefully will turn out to be good swag when I read through them. I did read through the Simpsons comic, though, because it’s generally my favorite free comic book.
But the family room has a third coat of red paint on it now, and while it still needs more touch-up work (plus a second coat of white on the ceiling and new canister lights installed and Ben wants to tear out the two doors so they’re straight and put on new trim), it’s getting closer to the Most Awesome Hang-out Room Evar!!!1111
I’ve been pushing for a foosball table ever since we moved in. Ben will someday give in and we will play and he will pwn me and I will be sad. But it will be worth it because foosball rocks! And my occasional victories will be cause for celebration! Fuzzy navels all around! (Or just orange juice with 7up in it if you’re my Mormon friends or my friends’ kids.) A pool table would be cool, too… but same story on the pwning I’m sure and really, I’ve been spending too much time console gaming lately (in our beautiful red-walled room that I really love despite it’s unfinished nature) to even think about having another worthy piece of gaming equipment in my house. Besides, we have a big screen TV in the spot where a pool table would otherwise go.
Also, I beat The Simpsons Game last night. I had to play "Dance Dance Revelation" against God on three consoles: the Praystation, Xodus Box and Hii. The existensial ending wasn’t as contemplative as it could have been because I found out that I’d only "completed" 68% of the game… so now, if I want to be OCD about it, I have to go back through many of the challenges and collect game cliches, bottlecaps, coupons, Krusty cards and Malibu Stacy cards. Which of course I’ll do, and probably rely on a game cheat website for the really hard ones. Hey, OCD doesn’t necessarily mean not lazy, m’kay?
Here’s what the final Dance Dance Revelation scene resembled (though I played it on the Xbox 360, with all the family members on the dance pad rather than just Bart). The best part (aside from the Scorpions’ "Rock you like a hurricane" song) are God’s lines. And the fact that he’s a gamer. But don’t watch it if you plan to play the game and want to experience the whole story line for yourself….
I have an early morning meeting at work today, and therefore not enough time to drink coffee and fully awaken before I leave home. So instead of writing anything interesting, profound, or lame, I will share a YouTube video that I came across last night!
The creators named it "Mario: Game Over." If I were in charge of naming this live-action interpretation of Mario and Friends in the Real World, I might call it "Mario and His #@$!&*! Mushrooms."
It’s a day that falls between my wedding anniversary and our started-dating anniversary (not that we’ve celebrated that since we got married). The date combination is the same as the Cincinnati-based banking institution 5/3 Bank. The date’s translation into 1337 is May e, zoob (which sounds Latin).
Visit your local comic book store for free comics and swag in honor of Free Comic Book Day
Visit your local scrapbook store in honor of National Scrapbooking Day
Spend the day playing the newly released Mario Kart (Wii)
Spend the day playing the newly released Grand Theft Auto IV (PS3, XBOX 360)
Begrudgingly ignore everything and work, do homework or work on your house all day
Ignore everything and sleep all day
For me, numbers 1, 6, 7 and 10 sound like attractive ideas. What about you? Am I missing any events or plausible choices here? I don’t know why, but it seems like now is a good time to start planning what you’re going to be doing on May 3rd.
I originally wrote this post on Friday morning, but lost it in another retarded instance of Movable Type software being an asshole. So I had to rewrite it and get the links again and post it late. But I left the original "publish" date because dammit, that’s when I wanted to post it!
What have I been doing, and why haven’t I posted any additional stories about volunteering at the Sundance Film Festival?
Saturday: Played Super Mario Galaxy almost all day. I think it’s the best video game ever and am still seeing star bits even when the game it turned off. Did some laundry and waited for Sunday.
Sunday: Went to Park City for the SFF. Got home around 2am, finally went to sleep around 3am. More on that later.
Monday: Woke up at normal time to go to work. Computer told me it had a critical RAID array problem. Called Ben, who had the day off (my company doesn’t care about MLK or civil rights, apparently) and he said he would check it when he came home. Went to work, where I had to restart my computer twice to get it to boot correctly. Ben called me with "worst case scenario" that I’d lost everything. I was overcome with panic for an hour or so, when Ben (still casual in tone, which pissed me off and comforted me at the same time) called to say that there was a glimmer of hope. Still panicked. Ben finally called back to tell me that the one hard drive had failed, and the other still had my data. Relief, finally, as well as perpetual panic because I am way overdue for backing stuff up. I needed to prune my data that evening, so instead I came home and ate dinner and pretty much crashed for the night.
Tuesday (today): Computer is working with one hard drive. I’m making copies of the most important documents (I think) on my drive but I need to go to work. I will write more about the SFF later today.
My experience at Sundance was incredible. I already know that I will volunteer again next year if possible. And I can’t wait to go back this weekend! Or some evening after work this week to see a movie.
Ben was making liquid bread this evening and had the windows open for ventilation.
“It’s FREEZING in here,” I said after coming home from grocery shopping after work. Ben rolled his eyes and kept on working. I played a little Mario Galaxy (I’m at 23 stars now) until my hands turned into icicles.
“It’s really, really cold in the house,” I said. Ben rolled his eyes again and told me to wait until he was finished. He eventually turned the heat back on and closed the windows. I checked the current temperature for our town on weather.com: 8 degrees. That’s -13.3 degrees Celsius.
“I told you it was cold in here,” I said with an icy stare (literally; I think my eyeballs are still coated with a sheet of ice).
“Oh hey,” I then said. “I should check to see what the weather forecast is for Park City on Wednesday when I’ll be there.”
A high of 13? Fuuuuuuuuck… At least I’ll get a free coat from the Sundance people. I can wear it over my other coat.
This is one of the earliest photos we have of Phoebe, just a couple weeks after we brought her home. She decided right away that she and Loki would be pals, and we caught them cuddling. Well, Loki was sleeping and Phoebe just crawled into bed with him. He looks huuuuge here, but is really only about 20 pounds.
Photo from July 28. Note the Playstation 1 controller in the background, probably out because our friends’ kids were playing Smurf Racer.
P.S. If Loki were in the zoo, he’d be in the Big Cat House.
Playing Super Mario Galaxy last night right before bed caused some weird planetary dreams to seep into my head overnight.
Maybe that’s how those wacky Japanese game creators get their bizarre ideas… they just take a nap right after playing something a little weird, then build upon that with ideas from their subsequently crazy dreams. Lather, rinse, repeat. Maybe eating sushi right before bed helps them, too.
Point 1: Mario games can be crazy weird and I love them. Point 2: I was upside down in parts of my dreams. Blargh!