Yvette's Inner Geek Blog

Naturally, Ben and I moved away from Cincinnati and BotCon decide to go there this year. Lucky WithaK!

All will be forgiven in light of Hasbro’s recent announcement of their 25th anniversary Optimus Prime Pack. Just in case you missed their 20th anniversary re-release of the generation one Optimus Prime (and several other Autobots and Decepticons that now reside Mint in Box in our house, even the spare ones that were purchased with the intention of taking them out to play with them). 

This one comes with the G1 Optimus Prime re-issue (what smart people at Hasbro: the molds are already made, so let’s recapture some of that secondary market money!), an "Autobot Shield" that recreates sounds and phrases, the original 3-part animated "More Than Meets the Eye" series (presumably on DVD) and a re-release of the original comic.

All for the low, low collector’s price of $69.99.

But, if you recall the G1 Transformers-induced age-regression of my husband a while back, I’m sure that this little gem will find its way into our home somehow. Knowing that if I purchase a second one for Ben to take out of the box that it will still stay in the box, at least I don’t have to worry about buying two!   

(I have no idea what that little white car thingy is in the photo, which is from the hasbro.com article.) 

Here’s how I get myself into trouble when browsing teh interwebz first thing in the morning while waking up with coffee. I attribute today’s "shiny!" attention span to the splash of French Vanilla International Delight non-dairy coffee creamer in my normally black–and-strong coffee.

So I remember that my subscription to Toyfare magazine needs to be renewed, but there’s no "renew online" on the stub that I got in the mail (btw, Wizard: that’s stupid). So, refusing to renew by mail because OMG who does that anymore, I go to wizarduniverse.com and find that of course you can renew online. And, for only a few dollars more, you can get an exclusive Futurama Series 1 Variant Dr. Zoidberg action figure by Toynami. 

Then, still budget conscious despite the caffeine high, I price check to find out how much the toy would cost without the subscription: $15 plus shipping. HELLO, I can get it way cheaper than that if I just add it on to the subscription that I was going to buy anyway!

But there are other Futurama Series 1 action figures in the regular line that I don’t have.

Doo d’doo… off I go to toynami.com/futurama.html and click "Where 2 Buy" and yes, I just ignore the fact that I had to click on a button in which a company has chosen to use the number 2 instead of the word "to." Whatevs, just show me where to buy mah toyz!

I recognize WickedCoolStuff.com
and go there, but find that they don’t have what I’m looking for. What do I instead see that I think is awesome and would be the perfect addition to the garden of my looks-normal-on-the-outside house? A Wizard of Oz Wicked Witch of the West frickin’ LEGS PLANTER. Nothing says domesticated oddball quite like one of these!

I don’t know if Wizard of Oz stuff can really be considered geeky, considering how ingrained in pop culture it is. But do you think that having this planter on my front porch or front garden would be geeky? Or just freakin’ awesome?

I wonder how quickly something like that would be stolen in my nice suburban Mormon neighborhood. Hey, it’s vandalaized once in a while just like any other suburb where meth and cocaine use are on the rise… I mean, Ben found toothpaste on his car one day, and neighbors informed us that they got toothpaste in their mailboxes. Dang kids and their petty vandalism. *shakes mouse like old man shakes a cane* 

Anyway, I need to go renew my Toyfare subscription and get my exclusive Dr. Zoidberg. I’ll hold off on the other action figures because I don’t really need them right now. But that reminds me… I think that the new Futurama DVD is out and I should order that, too… 

Aw crap. I don’t even have a PS3 or a Blu-Ray player yet, but Amazon.com has a Buy 2 Get 1 Free offer right now for Blu-Ray discs. Luckiily, the new straight-to-DVD Futurama movie (The Beast with a Billion Backs) isn’t coming out until June 24th.

The new Toyfare magazine (#113) came in the mail today. I started to browse through it after dinner while I was eating a cookie and drinking some soy milk. Ben looked over my shoulder when I called "Transformers!" and scoffed at Hasbro’s "A Blast from the Past" ad for a redesigned Megatron. "That’s not Megatron," he said, and walked away.

I ho-hummed a lot of the Incoming! annoucements, but perked up at the news of a new series coming out next summer from DC Direct: Fables! I love that series, so of course I put down my cookie and starting gushing about the new toys to Ben, who was by now sitting at his computer absorbing remnants of the 2006 baseball season. He (predictably) rolled his eyes, called me a geek and said that we didn’t need more toys, but that didn’t stop me from squealing and gushing, nor from giggling about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on the next page.

Then I called "Transformers!" again and quoted from page 53, "New Transformers Classics run rampant over Kentucky at BotCon 2006!"

"New Transformers Classics?," he hissed. "They all suck."

I brought him the magazine and he did his whole spiel of "they’ll never be as good as they used to be, these aren’t real Transformers, etc." peppered with a little "Why didn’t I know there was a BotCon in Lexington when we lived in Cincinnati?" I said that I would be happy to take the magazine back, and he said "In a minute." He turned the page and giggled a little "cool!" to himself and kept reading.

Then he turned to page 58 and I watched my husband (a self-proclaimed Not-a-Toy-Collector, except for model railroads which don’t count) turn into a nine-year-old boy. 

"SOUNDWAVE! The ORIGINAL! They’re re-releasing it just like they re-released some of them a few years ago!"

(I bought him the G1 reissues of Jazz and Optimus Prime to his pure, unabated delight) 

He proceeded to read me the blurb about the reissue as well as the captions… "And then Soundwave says ‘My crotch says ‘STOP’ but my heart says GO’ and Ravage, the cassette, says ‘…what does an MP3 look like?’ Tee hee! This is a GOTTA have. I have to have this! I can’t live without it! SOUNDWAVE!" 

I smiled as he geeked out and reverted to little boy excitement. "When does it come out?" I asked, taking the last bite of my cookie and a swig of milk.

"Let’s see… Spring 2007." Wait for it. "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

I knew it wouldn’t be out yet, and I knew he wouldn’t like having to wait. Yet I sat there with my mouth on my glass and inhaled with laughter at his reaction… then spit, as in near-vomit spit, all over the table and across it, all over Ben’s jacket that was hanging on the opposite chair.

I started choking and crying and when Ben came over and asked if I was okay, I nearly peed myself. I haven’t laughed that hard… ever, actually! It was a mix of pain and trying to gasp for breath with some milk still in my mouth and that cookie, that precious cookie that I did not want to lose.

I ran to the bathroom to let loose the flood of urine that threatened my dignity, laughing and crying all the way. It took me about 10 minutes to recover, and my chest still hurts. None of it came out of my nose, but wow.

Thank you, Transformers, for making my night.